TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
