I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
