sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
pray to the hookup gods
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
