just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
