i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Can we just discuss how hundreds of miles away we were both beyond drunk and in some boys bed. That is the definition of friendship.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize