I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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