I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
He followed me on twitter after I posted a drunk screen shot of a tweet. It's like he gave me permission to stalk him on a whole different level.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
Randomize
