As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
He found his first fuckbuddy I'm so proud I feel like making him a card or something
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
Randomize
