i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
sex in a hospital.. check
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
How did delivering mac n cheese to my drug dealer become a two hour outing?
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Randomize
