God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
Randomize
