Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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