If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Remember when I puked into a mesh garbage can in the middle of a meeting and told the clients it was "morning sickness"?
hahah yep
Well the are flying back here, it's been like 10 months, should I frame fake baby pics in my office?? Or too much?
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Randomize
