I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
I did not marry a roomba.
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