We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
sex in a hospital.. check
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
