I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
she woke up with a sticky ear
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
Randomize
