I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
no you cant smoke seaweed
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
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