real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Randomize