Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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