Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize