I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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