It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
No alcohol sales on Election Day. WTF? Today, of all days, I need to be splurged to to vote for any of these morons running for president.
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Randomize
