Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
