I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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