about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I didn't know what to do with her so I just tied her to a bench.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
i think im in europe. pls send help
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
