Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
The tit pic search didn't go as planned, some old guy sent me a pic of his balls and said stop texting his daughter. Better luck tomorrow
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize