My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
nutella sex= disaster
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Randomize
