If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
Randomize
