First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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