if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I made him say "i realize i'm cheating on my girlfriend" five times aloud before i would hook up with him. Somehow that has to lessen my bad karma
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
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