I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
Randomize