I just remembered that last night when we tried to walk off the spins you said "pretend i'm your pet dinosaur" so i walked you around on an invisible leash while you made t-rex hissing noises.
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
