and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
Dude in the stall next to me shitting and sobbing. Dude another stall over, "Come on bro, you gotta loosen up." This is why I don't shit in public.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
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