U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
so i have my big date this weekend, and i was practicing giving head with a bottle in the shower. i stopped and looked at the botton of the bottle. it was PURE MOLD! if i die, dont tell the doctors how this happened....
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
Randomize
