Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
Randomize
