I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Need sex. Gaining weight.
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Randomize
