the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Seriously, I was a high class hooker. I was snorting shit Rachel, white powder, lines formed with credit cards, the dudes house was beautiful. Magnum condom. Adorable puppy dog. Pretty sure at some point I was sleeping on a washing machine. Boxing Gloves.
Those were the highlights of my night.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
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