So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize