you turned your livingroom into a bong?
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
Randomize
