if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
