we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I had a nursing patient tell me that her favorite drink was vodka and ensure...called it a colorado bulldog
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize