You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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