I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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