Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
2:45a: Any chance you got 3000 bucks on you?
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize