All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize