I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I just got hit by a car and apologized to the driver. I asked him if he was okay.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Can you get arrested or in trouble for punching a dead relative in a casket?
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Doesn't matter how many times we tell him the kid's a freshman, he keeps repeating "cupcake boy shall be mine" and honestly you need to intervene
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
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