Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
