i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize