can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
Randomize
