I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
fucked a girl in Bentley hall at ten tonight, came on the carpet and I plan on doing it in another building soon. Watch where you walk
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
Randomize