Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
