Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
